What each Celebrity Treasure Island star’s food choice reveals about them


What food would you like eat forever on a deserted island ? Celebrity Treasure Island stars place their orders and we provide the top-tier analysis.

People do unusual things when they find themselves starving on a desert island. Castaway screenwriter William Moyles tore up coconuts and speared rays, devouring them raw, while he was writing the film. John Locke of Lost killed wild boars for their flesh. Candy Lane smuggled herbs and spices onto Celebrity Treasure Island in her makeup palette to enhance the taste of her beans and rice.

Which begs the question: what food would you take with you to a desert island to sustain yourself for an indefinite amount of time? Will you opt for comfort or nutrition? Sweet or salty ? Breakfast or dinner? We interviewed the stars of Celebrity Treasure Island 2022 and brought their answers to Charlotte Muru-Lanning, editor of The Spinoff’s weekly food newsletter The boil for his expert analysis.

A note on journalistic process: As with all rigorous experiments, for example Sensing Murder, each candidate’s name was withheld from Muru-Lanning to avoid unconscious bias.

APPLE ADDICTS

Deadlands actor Te Kohe Tuhaka replied “apples” in a split second. “Apples. I love apples,” he said, explaining that apples not only provide food, but also seeds. “And, if I need to spend time on an island, what better way to do that than to grow an apple tree?” Sports commentator Jesse Tuke took his time, but eventually reached the same answer as Tuhaka. “Apples: I can use them nutritionally and that’s the thing most similar to a ball, so I feel like I can use it for entertainment.”

“I feel like they’re enterprising, go-getter types,” Muru-Lanning said. “When they see an apple, they don’t just see a crunchy fruit. They see nutritional value, entertainment, industry and culture. They see the future.

SUSHI STATIONS

Actress Perlina Lau, radio host Alex King and boss Babe Iyia Liu all chose sushi for their desert island dish, with only slight variations in the filling. “You’ve got your protein, you’ve got your rice, it’s obviously delicious, and it comes with a carton of soy sauce. I’m going to get a 10-piece jumbo,” Lau ordered. Having become a lunchtime staple for hungry workers and students, sushi is perfectly reasonable on desert islands,” Muru-Lanning said. “Convenient, seemingly healthy, and comforting.”

MEAT MACHINES

Former All Black Ron Cribb begged for “Kobe beef from Japan, flown in” while Olympian Dylan Schmidt simply said, “Meat. Steak.” Our food critic was bowled over by the protein-fueled decision-making, remarking that both were “truly alarming” choices.

FANS OF FISH

Eds Eramiha, who is famous for not eating fries, had a request from the chef of Celebrity Treasure Island: “Yellowfin Tuna Sashimi,” he ordered. “It’s nutritious, it’s natural and it’s best for you.” Muru-Lanning was impressed: “She’s an agile candidate who knows her stuff,” she said. “Here we have an individual who doesn’t have time in the day to feel lazy.”

As for former Black Fern Melodie Robinson, it was all about pāua. “Paua. I like paua. I have excellent memories of my father who harvested it. Muru-Lanning was charmed by this response: “This person knows there is more to sustenance than nutrition and convenience. Whoever it is will bring a lot of heart to the competition.

CHICKEN CHAMPIONSHIPS

Mike King was looking for “a three-piece deluxe quarter, thigh + wing + drum combo with an extra bun and extra side dish.” Shimpal Lelisi simply demanded “fried chicken”, describing it as his “kryptonite”. Muru-Lanning saw shades of impulsiveness here. “Deliberately choosing a food that you know is your personal kryptonite might not be the wisest choice when it comes to food on a desert island, but it’s certainly the wisest decision.”

BREAKFAST SQUAD

Big Cereal has managed to convince us that breakfast is the most important meal of the day, and several of our celebrities seem to subscribe to this doctrine. Radio host Cam Mansel opted for “several muesli bars” because “you don’t have to make it”. Muru-Lanning backed down, “I hate to say it’s a weird choice, but it’s a weird choice. You’re stuck on a desert island, surely you have time to prepare yourself a little? She got more time for Rindelaub’s choice of breakfast burritos, declaring the scientist “one to watch.” “A simple choice that is actually remarkably clever. Convenient, delicious, and vague enough to accommodate variations.

As for the more chaotic starters, Shortland Street star Courtenay Louise started ordering spaghetti carbonara for her desert island dish, before dramatically zapping to Coco Pops. “A big culinary leap to take,” noted Muru-Lanning. “But upon further reflection, I have a clear idea of ​​what drives this individual: carbs and comfort.” Dame Susan Devoy simply asked for ‘coffee’ for every meal, a choice our reviewer called a ‘disaster in the making’.

THE REST

Guy Montgomery: Pasta (in a light red sauce)

As we’ve seen in previous entries, Montgomery’s response quickly shifted from a place of contentment to instant self-loathing. “I’d take like pasta with a light red sauce,” he bellowed. “But it’s yum and it’s made by a good cook – I don’t want it to be heavy,” he clarified. After a brief pause, Montgomery then revealed his true feelings about pasta with light red sauce: “I bombarded that question. I hate this answer.

“As a perfectionist myself, my advice to this pedantic colleague is to avoid indulging in these outbursts of self-loathing on the island,” Muru-Lanning said. “Instead, do your best to project it onto the competition.”

Karen O’Leary: Asparagus


“Only someone with a penchant for chaos would opt for asparagus. They’re charismatic and spontaneous, of course. Would I trust them? Absolutely not.”

Cassie Roma: Cobb Salad

“A Cobb salad is the most beautiful food you can put in a bowl,” the Aotearoa apprentice mentor sighed wistfully. “It starts with fresh iceberg lettuce or spinach then on top you have tomato, carrot, onion, salmon, avocado, bacon and all served with a vinaigrette with blue cheese.” Muru-Lanning found the argument “persuasive” from someone who has to spend a lot of time jet-setting. “I’ve never seen a Cobb salad this side of the equator,” she remarked.

Siobhan MarshallChocolate

“It’s got caffeine, energy and it’s delicious,” said Outrageous Fortune star Siobhan Marshall. Muru-Lanning had no qualms about answering this question. “When Nigella says ‘Hello chocolate lovers’, this blind chocoholic replies, ‘Hello Nigella’.”

Lynette Forday: Cheese Scones

Muru-Lanning saw a competitor from the middle of the pack, a regular at their local cafe, in these cheese scones. “The guy who bursts in the cafe door at 8am chirping “Just as usual, thanks” which of course translates to a medium flat white and cheese scone to go.”

Elvis Lopeti: Spring Rolls

“This person knows who they are and they don’t hesitate to do so. This kind of self-awareness can be a useful asset as a candidate, but it can just as easily lead to downfall.

Celebrity Treasure Island starts Monday 5 at 7:30 p.m. on TVNZ2


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